Hmm…..
What if you had a choice to make?
One that could extend your life or one that could shorten it–immediately?
Sound like an obvious choice to make?
Not so–not now, for me at least.
Now, as I examine my current life situation, I find that wrapped within the outer coating of that question lies the inner question, the question that begs an answer each and every day and has begged one since the day I first became aware of choice.
That question is: How do I choose to live my life?
If taking chemo and feeling crummy means a longer life,
while taking less chemo and feeling better means living life,
which do I choose?
I choose life!
Some days that choice will look like being sick in bed due to chemo effects.
Some days that choice will look like leaving pills behind so I feel well enough to do activities I love.
That happened last Wednesday.
Susan Greaves, one of my favorite artists, demonstrated plein air oil painting (painting on site) .
Susan Greaves–What a Site!
She painted and I loved. Loved that I could be there. Loved that others in class loved being there, too. Loved that Susan is willing to share herself with others. Loved nature. Loved being alive. Loved.
As for making that final choice about chemo, I am not ready to give it up yet. The new drug is harder, but who said life is easy? The pills are easier to swallow, but when their taste becomes too bitter, I ease up. I’m not recommending any other cancer patient do the same, I’m just saying…for me…
I choose to live until I die.
And if that results in a little beauty and love along the way, then I say, “Bring it on!”
Shared Beauty!
Beautiful! You are sooooo amazing! xoxox
Thanks, Sweetie. Thanks, too, for carrying me during my roughest times!
G-d Bless you Gayle! You are am inspiration to many!
Sending you love and hugs
So are you, Wanda. This is a tough assignment we’ve both been given–no?
As usual your attitude and strength amaze me.
Thank you! I suspect you would do the same given the same situation!
Where’s the “like” button? Gayle, you give me far more credit than I deserve. Your presence in the class adds a dimension far beyond my daubing.
Cute! I think if you doubt the credit you deserve, look in the mirror at that twinkle in your eye. It’s one of the brightest I have ever seen!
Father, we want to know You better. We want to be closer. We want to be free from worry and anxiety about our future.
This Easter, purify us Lord. Give us a fresh new start in trusting that You have our best interests in mind, and by sticking close to You and following Your instructions, it will all turn out okay.
Lord, I look forward to experiencing a deeper relationship with You, since I know this request pleases You, I know it will come to pass. I can’t wait. Love and prayers Sharon
Dear Sharon, I love your prayer. It is my prayer, too, even more powerful since you have spoken it on my behalf. Sounds like Easter will be one powerful day!
Such explicit joy you bring to the written word! Love the painting too!
Thanks, Kat!I love writing the written word. Not much for the spoken word, however, unless I’m doing the speaking. 🙂 The painting is Susan’s. What’s not to love!
Living life? Yes, indeed! For me that means freedom—the freedom to choose. Ahaa… how sweet our freedom is, as you so graciously remind me, Gayle. Much love to you and Mike during this glorious, spring season 🙂
Hi Joyce, Freedom is sweet–that’s what I love about being an adult: I get to do anything I want! Happy spring to you, too, sweet friend.
Gayle, Your strength and inspiration are an incredible gift to me. We can’t possible know what our choice would be until we were faced with the decisions you’re experiencing. You seem to know what your body and spirit need to live your life to the fullest. God Bless you, sweet Gayle. You are so very loved. Your painting is gorgeous, and so are you! xoxo
Hi Canda, You’re sweet, but I know your strength in the face of such challenges would be just as strong. My strength runs into its weak link once in the while and I have myself a good cry! And you’re right, that is Susan’s painting. She’s master, isn’t she?!
Just realized that was Susan’s painting. Well you’re still gorgeous!
How much are you selling your painting for? It’s GORGEOUS!!!!!!! And you inspire me with every word on paper (and real life) Bless you darling woman, and Happy Easter! Francie
Hi Francie, Actually, you’d have to check with Susan about the painting–it’s the end product of her demonstration. If I could paint like she does, I’d paint the world! In the meantime, I’ll stick with my words on paper. I do have a book coming out in the near future, however. I’ll sell that one when the time comes. Hugs to you and Bill.
Gayle, you mentioned a book.
A book with your thoughts as you express them would be a treasure to me. I look forward to seeing it and painting with you again sometime soon.
Love you and life
Lynda
Hi Lynda,
The painting together happened sooner than we thought! Had so much fun yesterday with you and Bobbie at Sandi’s. Yes, the book is well under way. I look forward to getting it launched!
You’re finished picture of the day was worth everything you are doing and choosing to do or not to do.
Love Dennis and Liz
Hi Liz, That’s actually Susan’s painting. You can see why I like her art so much!